Kid Questions Are The Best

I’ve been bopping from elementary school to elementary school this spring, talking about reading and writing and my favorite authors, and how much I love Star Wars, and how I love writing but how I sometimes hate it too, although ultimately I’m so happy to be an author.

But the best part of a school visit is when I’m done with my 20 minute rambling soliloquy and the kids get to ask questions. Here are some of the best so far:


Kid: How much money do you make?

Me: Enough to make me happy, but I can’t quit my day job as a respiratory therapist.

Kid: Yeah, but give me a real number.


Kid: I’m writing a story inspired by Franz Kafka and Homer.

Me: Oh yeah? What’s it about?

Kid: It’s basically The Iliad but with cockroaches.



Kid: Which of your two books is your favorite?

Me: Aw man, that’s like asking me which one of my kids is my favorite.

Kid: So, which one of your kids is your favorite?


Kid: Are you ever going to write a book that your daughter can illustrate?

Me: I would love to do that!

Kid: Would you take all the money or would you give her some?


Kid: Have you ever met anyone famous?

Me: Well, I’ve met a lot of authors, and to me, they’re quite cool and famous.

Kid: No, I mean someone really famous. Like Ariana Grande.

Follow-Up Question From Another Kid: Have you met 50 Cent?


Kid: Have you written a book that hasn’t been published?

Me: Yes! I wrote a book about washing windows when I as a much younger man. It was partly true, partly fiction.

Kid: Are you going to publish it?

Me: I doubt it.

Kid: Why’d you give up?


Kid: How do you make a book?

Me: It takes a lot of work! I write and write and write and edit and then I rewrite most of it several times and edit it some more and when I’m finally ready, I send the manuscript to my editor.

Kid: No, I mean, how do you make it?

Me: So let’s begin with how paper is made …


Kid: Can you name one of your characters after me?

Me: Maybe. What’s your name?

Kid: Jack Sloane.

Me: Wow. That’s a tough guy character name if I’ve ever heard one. You got it!

Next 4 Questions: Can you name a character after me? Can you name a character after me? Can you name a character after me? Can you name a character after me?


Kid: Do you need to go to college to be a writer?

Me: Absolutely not.

Kid: Good.


Kid: Do you want someone to make a movie of your book?

Me: I think that’d be pretty cool.

Kid: But aren’t you afraid they’d ruin it?

Me: Yes.


And these are just the first 10 that popped in my head. More later!

⁓ George 4/29/23